"One of the most important — and gutsiest — things you can do as a boss and leader is to shut the hell up and listen.” – Kate White
Great leaders communicate their thoughts, ideas, and instincts brilliantly. Leaders of influence understand that active listening is as critical to their impact as their ability to communicate.
When we’re the boss, we tend to believe our job is to tell people what to do and to look like we have all the answers. We think, ‘I’ve got to be right,’ and that means talkative, verbal.” - Hal Gregersen, MIT Leadership Center
Active Listening Is A Leadership Skill
Practice active listening to aid in conflict resolution or relationship building.”
Active listening is a powerful tool for a leader and a great way to gain information and perspective. As you work on improving your leadership skills, practice active listening.
Active listening is a type of communication that is especially useful in a one-on-one dialogue situation. It is often used in the context of conflict resolution. This type of listening is also helpful when you are trying to build relationships with others. You work to understand the point of view of the other person before you decide to have the other person understand your point of view.
Active listening is a tool for respect and understanding. Respect underlies all the steps in this process. When you start from a place of genuine honor for the other person, all these techniques will come easier. In turn, you will also be more respected in the process.
When employees say they want their voices to be heard, they want you to really listen to them. As employees seek more attention, feedback, and support, you must become more mindful of individual needs. You then can inspire professional development and performance.
Active Listening is a Leadership Responsibility
If you listen to your employees, you are in a much better position to lead the diverse and multigenerational workforce. The “one-approach-fits-all” way of thinking is outdated. Embracing active listening makes you a better and more compassionate leader.
Leaders who listen create trustworthy relationships that are transparent and breed loyalty. You have your employees’ best interests at heart because you listen to them. Here are a few statistics that will make you think about the importance of active listening:
- 85% of what we know we have learned through listening
- Humans generally listen at a 25% comprehension rate
- In a typical business day, we spend 45% of our time listening, 30% of our time talking, 16% reading and 9% writing
- Fewer than 2% of professionals have had formal training to improve their listening skills and techniques
As a leader, take the time listen to your employees. It is difficult to know what they are thinking about, what is troubling them or how to help them get out of a performance slump. Active listening goes well beyond being quiet and giving someone your full attention. It requires you to be aware of body language, facial expressions, mood, and natural behavioral tendencies. Active listening is a full-time job.
As a leader, you must balance your intensity and desire to perform with compassionate attention to your employees’ needs. Boost your emotional intelligence — be mindful of another’s stress and their tension points before they impact the business.
Are You an Everyday Leader or an Influential Leader?
Smart leaders develop inquisitive practices and stay on the lookout for both passive data and active data. Otherwise, they are in a good-news bubble, where people neglect to share bad but critical-to-know information.
A leader shapes decisions, goals and priorities within their organization. Influential leaders also shape employee engagement, commitment, loyalty, and culture. One key differentiator of an everyday leader versus an influential leader is the ability to listen in a way that impacts others. You can perceive their value to the organization.
Influential leaders gain credibility and trust by demonstrating strong communication skills. They recognize the value of active listening and how they characterize their commitment to the organization and its people. Influential leaders do not passively listen; they actively listen and seek information others may miss. It is a matter of finding out what you do not know:
- Do you listen as well as you should?
- Do you give your staff enough of an opportunity to share the news and developments that could have a real impact?
Elevate Your Leadership Status
The leader's role is critical to the success of any organization. As you climb the Ladder of Leadership, the demands increase. Leading with influence elevates the relationship, credibility, trust, and engagement. To influence others to act upon what you have to say, begin first by listening with the following action-oriented listening skills. You need to practice the skills below routinely. Become natural and habitual, whether it is in a high-stakes meeting or casual conversation.
Quiet Your Inner Dialogue — Do Not Interrupt
How many times has your leader interrupted your train of thought?
It is fair to say this is a common occurrence. Listen and do not disrupt the flow of the dialogue. Embrace two-way communication and be aware that with every interruption comes disengagement. Practice being quiet. There is a good chance that this may not come naturally, and you will have to make a serious commitment not to speak up. Sit still as the person speaks, maintain eye contact, and nod to show you are paying attention. You will earn respect from your staff and peers by being a patient listener.
Have you ever tried listening to someone speak while your mind is running a marathon of thoughts?
Stay focused on what your employees are saying. Stay in the moment and be respectful of others. Listen, and you will become a more compassionate leader. Employees respect those leaders that listen because they know how difficult listening can be.
Aside from the daily external distractions, your inner dialogue can create a silent distraction. It challenges you from hearing and understanding what another person is trying to convey.
Do not rush to fill in the blanks. Wait for a beat after someone answers in case she has more to say but is feeling nervous and hesitant. Respond with another question rather than a comment, showing that you are curious. You are gathering information, not trying to trip someone up. Get into the habit of asking
- “What’s working?”
- “What’s not working?”
- “Why?” or “Why not?”
When the news is not good, you need to avoid responding in a negative, kneejerk way. Remain neutral, ask questions. Let the person see that it is safe to share the news.
One aspect that separates leaders from those of influence is their ability to think strategically. Think beyond challenges that each day brings. To be a good listener, allow time each day to be strategic with your thinking and reflect upon your team's goals and objectives. By permitting time for solitude and reflection, you can clear your mind. You can focus on what others are saying without distraction from your internal dialogue.
Put Others First — Show That You Care
When you care about your employees, they work harder and aim to exceed your expectations. Employees want to be led by someone who genuinely cares about who they are and what they represent to the team and organization at-large. Do not just view your employees as tools and resources for your success. View them as people and valuable assets who bring unique capabilities and aptitudes beyond their job functions. Employees want leaders who care about their general well-being. They depend upon you during times of professional and personal hardships.
Put others first and inspire employee talent by allowing them to speak and share ideas rather than providing all the answers. You listen to what motivates your employees and benefits clients. You build your messages to meet the needs of others. As a leader of influence, you read between the lines to find what inspires someone's thought processes and perspectives.
Before responding with commentary of any sort, you consider why the topic is relevant to your listeners. Ask open-ended questions that help reveal the reasoning behind listeners' needs. This ensures your interactions are two-sided and not perceived as lectures. As a result, you build a reputation as someone who is engaging and does not waste people's time.
It is a leader's responsibility to respect everyone's time, priorities and perspectives. If a conversation is becoming derailed or losing focus, do not hesitate to get the conversation back on track. Keep it moving forward, focusing on your listeners' specific needs.
Great Leaders Know How to Balance the Head and The Heart
The workplace has stress and pressures each day. Everyone manages stress and pressure differently. It is crucial for you to be empathetic to how these distractors impact your employees’ performance.
Express your concern and show your employees that you feel their frustrations. Do not be afraid to express a sentiment or think that it will weaken your stature or authority as a leader. Empathy is a dominant display of listening. It is one of the 85 behavioral traits we measure. Many leaders avoid emotional interactions. The best leaders know how to empathize and make themselves approachable to those who need attention.
Engage Yourself
Beyond caring, engage yourself in matters relevant to your employees. When they share their opinions, ask questions and encourage them to elaborate and expand upon their perspectives. Participating actively, holding yourself accountable and following-up with your employees shows that you are paying attention. You are attempting to understand what matters most to them.
I listen best by taking notes and picking up on big ideas and keywords. I always keep the notes and have made a habit of reviewing them for patterns and meaning. This can be especially useful in a larger organization, where leaders often serve in cross-functional roles. Listening to a common theme emerge across divisions can give you valuable insight into the most pressing priorities.” — Sally Susman, Pfizer
Early in my career with Ontario Hydro, Hal Wright, our Regional Director, told me that I had a unique way of expressing myself in meetings. He appreciated me offering innovative ideas and insights. Instead of trying to mold me into being someone I wasn’t, he encouraged me to speak up. My insights help stimulate our team meetings. Hal made me feel that he was listening, valued and applied what he interpreted about my style into action. To this day, I am grateful for having such a compassionate leader — as he gave me the extra incentive to be my authentic self.
Model the Behavior You Want Others to Emulate
Employees follow suit when they observe you listening, putting others first, demonstrating consistency and investing in their ongoing communication skills development.
When employees fail to see leadership acting as expected, they become disengaged, losing trust in those within leadership ranks. When employees see leaders of influence modeling expected behavior, credibility grows, and action follows suit.
Do Not Judge Others
If you are judging others, you are not listening. Defer judgment. Try to approach the situation with curiosity for the other person’s point of view. When you are judging another before listening, you tend to interrupt. This should be avoided, as it will only frustrate the speaker and limit your ability to understand.
Too many times leaders make harsh criticisms about those with a different style or approach. Instead of judging someone, learn from them. When you judge, you expose your immaturity and inability to embrace differences. These leaders may enjoy a long track record of success in one company but often find it difficult to make the successful transition into a new company. I have been the CEO of six organizations over the past twenty-five years, and I learned you need a clear lens when you enter a new organization. That lens fogs-up as soon as you start judging others.
Leaders Must Not Grow Complacent
The 21st-century leader must be an Agile Leaders. They can sense an organization’s needs for significant change. They respond to opportunities or obstacles through planning, swift execution. They do not lose momentum or alignment. Agile leadership is inclusive, democratic, and exhibit a greater openness to ideas and innovations. With a passion for learning, a focus on developing people, and a keen ability to define and communicate. The core of the Agile leadership style’s intent is not just surviving during chaos but adapting and creating a new future through demonstrating imaginative and insightful leadership when the status quo is challenged.
Be Expansively Mindful
Great leaders are mindful of their surroundings. You know how to actively listen beyond the obvious via both verbal and non-verbal communication. Avoid being distracted by factors such as side conversations or technology. You may wish to consider having a personal i-Box in your office. Also, you avoid using the time when the other person is talking to prepare your rebuttal mentally.
Show you are listening. Your non-verbal body language will speak volumes! Use eye contact, head nods, and facial expressions to convey your interest. Small verbal comments like “yes” or “uh-huh” will encourage the speaker to continue and shows executive presence. You are always tuned in to the dynamics that are taking place around you.
Mindful leaders are listening to the conversations and engaging in the dialogue. You cannot fake it. You must note what is being said and how people are saying it and are making continuous eye-contact and gestures. Everyone is watching your every move and action as a leader. If you appear disconnected, you are perceived as disinterested and not listening. Never stop being expansively mindful.
Listening is not just about hearing people talk. It is about walking the floor and observing, reading body language. It is about looking at information and data that people provide and being curious, even if it runs contrary to your thinking.
Provide Feedback
Reflect what has been said by paraphrasing; use language such as
- “What I am hearing is ___.”
- “Sounds like you are saying ___.”
Ask questions to clarify specific points.
- “What do you mean when you say ___?”
- “Is this what you mean?”
Periodically summarize the speaker’s comments. Respond appropriately. Keeping in mind your goal is to improve your understanding of the other person; you can express your opinions respectfully. Be candid and honest, but also treat the other person like you would like to be treated.
You may find yourself responding emotionally to what someone says. If this happens, acknowledge your response and give the speaker a chance to provide you with more information. Try something like,
- “I may not be understanding you correctly, and I find myself taking what you said personally. What I thought you just said is ___; is that what you meant?”
Train Employees
Real leaders understand the team effort that goes into every success. They value the investment each team member makes. They recognize that strategies and goals cannot be executed alone but rather by a group they train and trust. As a team of professional athletes, good coaching, training and skills development are a must.
As a leader of influence, you tune into the needs of your team and encourage employees to identify and improve upon their weaknesses. The time spent training employees to be dedicated listeners is as important as educating them on company systems, policies, and procedures.
A workplace study sponsored by Siemens found that employees spend an average of 17.5 hours per week clarifying communication issues and breakdowns between peers, leadership, and customers. This would cost a 100-employee business more than $500K annually in lost productivity. Show the value you place on each work hour, the success of your team and customer experience by being intentional with employee training. Training your employees to communicate with clarity means teaching them to be active listeners.
In our analytics we measure the behavioral competency “communicates with clarity.” Changing how we listen to others requires changing our habits. Create regular sessions where your team can practice their skills and apply them in daily work conversations. When employees understand their behavioral strengths and challenges, they elevate their communication skills. They have more impact in their day-to-day work.
Set the Example
Influential leaders are successful in their daily interactions. They are committed to demonstrating these skills, no matter the importance of the conversation. They earn credibility and trust.
You need to understand that your ability to listen is as critical to your impact on others as your ability to communicate. You recognize the importance of setting positive examples and modeling the kinds of skills you want employees to adopt. Employees mimic the behavior of leadership and carry that throughout the company culture. A study by the Ethics Resource Center found many employees react based on their environmental circumstances set by their leaders even if it means compromising their ideals.
- 76% of employees in organizations with weak ethical cultures observed misconduct among their leadership compared to only 39% of employees of companies with strong ethical cultures
- 15% of those from weak cultures felt pressured to commit misconduct compared to only 4% of employees working in a healthy, ethically led company culture
Next Steps
Active listening can be a great way to improve your communication skills and build trust with others. An excellent place to start is to understand your behavioral strengths and challenges. In stressful situations and conversations, we tend to over-invest in our strength and may not use the most effective approach. We are incredibly passionate about Behavioral DNA and the impact this scientific insight can have on you. Using SuccessFinder, you can discover your behavioral strengths and challenges.
High performers in each role share a common subset of behaviors. Our talent analytics compares your talent stack — behavioral traits and competencies — with top performers. We show you how to use these powerful analytics to achieve career satisfaction and success.
With a few steps, you can develop your listening skills and add to your leadership capacity. We focus on your strengths and provide techniques for managing your challenges. We include both in your development plan. You complete the assessment online, we then offer you a report and personal feedback via video call. We offer the service worldwide. We’d love to hear from you!
Ladder of Leadership: New Research Unveiled
A behavioral competency model for driving top performance at three corporate leadership levels.
In the paper we share the competencies that are:
- Always On: Only two behaviors from manager to C-Suite
- Leap: “Bridging” behaviors for moving between each management level
- Lead: Unique behaviors for every stage of management
- Leave Behinds: The “once and done” list— good only for where you are, not where you’re going