It is a fine line between helping your child make career choices and doing it for them.
EY, the global professional services organization, reported almost half of the parents are unaware of the range of options open to young people turning 18, and that more than half did not fully understand the long-term implications for their children's careers.
While most parents are well-intentioned in supporting their children at critical stages in their academic career, the simple reality is that in a rapidly changing world, they're not always fully equipped with the resources to do so successfully.
Virginia Isaac tips on guiding your child into the world of work inspired this insight. Ms. Isaac is CEO of The Inspiring Futures Foundation which provides impartial, expert careers guidance.
Here is my guide for parents on how best to support their children in their career choices:
It's a changing world
The simple reality is the world is a very different place today to the one you will have faced when making study, training and career-related decisions. New roles emerge all the time, and it seems many jobs open to young people today didn't even exist ten years ago. While a report from the Education Endowment Foundation last year found non-cognitive skills are increasingly seen at least as important as cognitive skills or IQ in determining job prospects. These equally critical other factors include character, persistence, ability to cope with failure, to make connections and to think critically.
A good starting point to better understand the range of job options available and what skills employers are looking for is to visit the job profiles section of the National Careers Service website. It categorizes roles by occupation. O*NET OnLine has detailed descriptions of the world of work for use by job seekers, workforce development and HR professionals, students, researchers, and more! These resources will enable you both to examine some of the particular positions in the area your child is most interested in.
You can also help by supporting your child as they discover where their non-academic strengths lie. Psychometric profiling is an effective means of doing this and provides an element of impartiality – something difficult for a parent to achieve. There is a range of tests but to find out more information, visit Futurewise New Generation.
Encourage individuality
Be careful that you don't unintentionally pressure your child to realize your unfulfilled ambitions. They may not be suited to the career you once dreamed of, but remember they're an individual and need to be given the freedom and space to live their own life.
Where your concern over their career and study choices may be sincerely held, it is vital that your advice and expertise remain impartial. You should be realistic about your child's potential, and seeking guidance from their school or college as to their possible educational achievements will help to identify appropriate routes out there.
Play the Judgement Game
For generations, success required us to be the same as everyone else in our field, only better. This "standard formula" works for fifteen to twenty percent of the people. However, it leaves most of us feeling disengaged and frustrated to various degrees. Moreover, the standard formula seems to be an only possible path to financial security and fulfilling life. You can find fulfilment by playing the judgement game to uncover your best self.
For most of us, when we think about success, it's pretty narrow, and we end up thinking about things like wealth, status, power. And we sort of think that you have to choose between that and being happy – and dark horses show us that you actually don't have to choose." —Todd Rose
In the Dark Horse Project at Harvard, Todd Rose and Ogi Ogas studied women and men who achieved remarkable success even though nobody saw them coming. Uncovering your “micro-motives” are crucial to finding fulfilment. Interestingly, these motives are the collection of your super-specialized things that make your heart sing. Fulfilment leads to success at work, not the other way around. In their new book, Dark Horse: Achieving Success Through the Pursuit of Fulfillment, Todd Rose and Ogi Ogas, social scientists from Harvard, set out the judgement game as an easy way to identify your micro-motives.
The authors show how the four elements of the dark horse mindset empower you to reliably make the right choices that fit your unique interests, abilities, and circumstances and will guide you to a life of purpose, passion, and achievement.
Open your mind to alternatives
Do not assume that your child will follow your academic path. Today, more than ever, there is a myriad of options for breaking into different sectors. Earning while they learn on an apprenticeship may not only be better suited to your child but will allow them to avoid the daunting student debts that so many young people experience.
There are a wealth of online resources which can help to explain the various paths that you and your child may wish to consider, including the UCAS Progress website for information on further education and college options, Which? University, or the not going to university site which provides details on alternative options such as apprenticeships, employment options, and sponsored degrees.
Encourage networking
A rich and varied CV can pique the interest of an admissions tutor or potential employer. You should encourage your child to seek out work experience placements, take up volunteering roles, attend taster days, or speak with people already working in a sector that they're interested in. It may be that your professional and social networks can come in handy here.
It is never too early to start thinking about the future – encouraging your child to start a portfolio of experiences for use in a future CV or as part of a personal statement can be beneficial from as early as the ninth grade. Remind them to record all their work experience placements and gain references from them, as well as include part-time jobs held and roles involving responsibility either at school or outside organizations.
It's also a good idea to ask someone not familiar with your child to appraise their CV/personal statement and review how it comes across given they won't have preconceived opinions of them as an individual.
Get to know key dates and be prepared for what's ahead – we all know teenagers aren't always the most communicative or organized, so there's no harm in equipping yourself with knowledge of the critical dates for each stage of their academic career. From as early as 13 you can support them by attending subject option evenings for GCSE (or equivalent) choices.
By 14 or 15 they should be thinking about first work experience placements, and you'll undoubtedly be able to help with this. By the time they've completed formal education, you can be on hand to assist with preparing for, and travelling to, university and college open days or job interviews.
Be prepared to let go
There can be a delicate balance between giving guidance and supporting your child and becoming a parent who can't resist taking over and organizing everything for them. Up until 16, many decisions relating to their education will have been made for them, so it is a good idea to start encouraging some independence that will enable them to cope when the time comes. This empowerment does not have to mean a sink or swim scenario, and you'll naturally want to discuss things with them – make sure you are in the background.
What about school?
There is quite a variation in the level and sophistication of guidance and support offered by schools in the UK – an issue often discussed in the media – and it may be you feel that your child's school isn't providing this to a sufficient level, or to meet their bespoke needs.
If this is the case, Careers Advice for Parents, Parental Guidance, and the National Careers Service all serve as a useful starting point offering guidance and signposting parents to both free and paid-for services. However, in the same way, as some parents choose to invest in private tuition for their child, you might also decide to seek professional careers guidance when subject or career choices need to be made.
We offer a program based on the student's performance traits to point them in the right direction to explore possible career directions.
Free Resources
Check out our free resources to help students navigate the route to career success and satisfaction.
Your Challenge — What's Right For You?
Did you know that:
- 40% of College students don’t graduate
- 80% of College students change majors — on average three times
- 50%+ of College grads believe they got the wrong degree
- On average it takes six years to earn a four-year degree
Know Your Natural Talents - Identify your unique performance strengthens, develop your passion, choose the right college program to build your unique talent stack further, then and leverage your career capital for lifetime success. We provide free resources and offer insights to navigate the route to career success and satisfaction.
- Powerful Career Advice for Your High School Student
- Who should choose the career of a child – parents or children?
- Parents — Tips you need to know to boost your High Schooler’s career success
- Some postsecondary students and their parents are about to make a $20,000 mistake
- How to help your child navigate a route to career success