How to Undermine Your Reputation

It seems like we are all pretty good at shooting ourselves in the foot. Every day we are reading about another dominant figure imploding on their egregious misdeeds. Our natural behavioral traits serve us well; however, specific behaviors are less effective if demonstrated too strongly. Also, for the behaviors that are a challenge for us can even get us in even more trouble and damage our reputation.

There are so many things that can kill the careers of good, hard-working people. Honest mistakes often carry hard-hitting consequences. Most people kill their careers in subtle, decidedly undramatic ways. Moreover, it is a shame because it happens all the time.

A recent survey by VitalSmarts found that 83% of people had seen someone make a blunder that had catastrophic results for his or her career, reputation, or business, and 69% admitted that they had done something that had damaged their jobs:

• 31% said it cost them a promotion, a raise, or even a job
• 27% said it hurt a working relationship
• 11% said it destroyed their reputation

Reputation is a Fragile House

It takes 20 years to build a reputation but only 5 minutes to destroy it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.” – Warren Buffett

How often do you remember the one negative thing that someone did despite his or her decades of good deeds?

To handle the fragile house of reputation Buffet uses and advises those he meets to use the front page of the newspaper rule.

“For every action, imagine whatever you choose to do is going to be on the front cover of tomorrows newspaper and your closest friends and family members are going to read the story.”

This is a simple yet effective rule. I use this rule. It is changed how I think about specific actions. Do not let the views of others hold you back from doing something you enjoy, just know that it will affect your reputation. If it is best for you, it is worth it.

Once your reputation is ruined, it is tough to get it back. Reputations take years to build but can crash in a second. You must covet your reputation and protect it— it is as essential as, say, your credit score. People will hire you based on your reputation; give you money to fund a startup based on your reputation; connect you to others based on your reputation.

However, you do not have to do something drastic to ruin your reputation. Sometimes, small things you do can ding you; commit enough of them, and you will start to see an impact.

Radiate CEO Betty Liu shared three things many of us do that may be ruining our reputation. She advised “Don't kick yourself if you have committed these "crimes"—I have too.” Be aware and minimize them.

Not Following Up

How many times has someone told you they would call you back or connect you to so-and-so or follow-up with an email and he or she never does? People tend to be understanding about this—hey, we are all super busy—but do enough of that to a mass of people, and you build a reputation as someone who is unreliable. Pretty soon, that will become the way people describe you. Every time you make that promise, stick to it and follow-up. It never failed that the most successful people I met would always do exactly as they said they would—send me the book they mentioned, follow-up with a call, set up a meeting. It did not mean those things happened right away—what mattered is those things were done.

Being a hypocrite

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.”

Be very careful with this. Often, we tend to criticize behaviors that we end up committing ourselves. For instance, Suzy in the office hates when people gossip, and yet, she is gossiping all the time. Alternatively, Matt calls out people who do not meet deadlines and then fails to meet his own. The moment you critique something, you have set yourself up to adhere to a higher standard. Not being able to "walk the talk" will brand you as a hypocrite and make people trust you less.

Talking too much

Live by one rule of thumb: Listen more than you talk.

Let's face it; most people do not want to hear you speak unless it is about themselves or it is about dirt on someone else. We are all wired to focus on ourselves. If you talk too much, people tune you out. You are too self-involved, tone-deaf or plain selfish. Every time you find yourself holding court and rambling on, stop for a minute and ask the other person, "What do you think?" Refrain from being the one who always has something to say. The more you listen, the more people will pay attention to you.

Listening and Presence

When you listen into the eyes of your people, customers and investors with the sole purpose of alleviating pain and assuaging fear and then do both, they will reveal their hopes and dreams, and that is when the magic happens.” – Mark Goulston

I have found listening at the top of the list. Loews Hotels Chairman and CEO Jon Tisch says listening is one of the critical skills for anyone leading a company or a team.

Listening: the process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and non-verbal messages.”– International Listening Association.

The goal of the listening can define listening types. The three main types of listening most common in interpersonal communication are:

• Informational Listening (Listening to Learn)
• Critical Listening (Listening to Evaluate and Analyze)
• Therapeutic or Empathetic Listening (Listening to Understand Feeling and Emotion)

You may have more than one goal for listening at any given time – for example, you may be listening to learn while also attempting to be empathetic.

You may wish to explore this further.

In my recent post The remarkable truth about leadership and presence, I point out that when you are present in a conversation or a meeting, others around you perceive you as entirely focused on the matter at hand and on being of value to them. In a follow-up post,  How to be Remarkably Lucky – Have an Open Mind, I set out that more observant you are of your surroundings, the more likely you are to capture a valuable resource, see an opportunity, or avoid tragedy. Lucky people do not magically attract new opportunities and good fortune. They stroll along with their eyes wide open, fully present in the moment (a problem for people glued to phone screens).

Business Ethics

Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger have worked together for 49 years. They believe that they have both done better in business because of having good ethics.

You can make money by double-crossing people and ripping people off, but that’s not sustainable, for any kind of relationship, especially business.” -Warren Buffett

This principle comes back to treating people right. Treating other people right in any scenario does not always guarantee they will do the same in return. However, it is indeed more likely that if you are treating people wrong, it will eventually be your downfall.

It is incredible how your view of the world can change when you start to believe that people are inherently good.

Travis Bradberry shared 7 Things That Will Destroy Your Career. Here are the key ones that are not covered above.

Playing politics

Working hard to build strong work relationships is very different from instigating conflict, choosing sides, undermining colleagues, spreading rumors, and all the other things that fall under the umbrella of “playing politics.” Again, it comes down to authenticity. If you find yourself sneaking around or if you are embarrassed if some of your behind-the-scenes manipulations come to light, that is politics. Stick to strategies you would be proud to discuss in front of your colleagues.

Complacency

How long has it been since you proactively learned a new skill, reached out to your networking contacts, or even polished up your resume? If you did not remember, you might have become a bit complacent, and complacency is a real career killer. It is what happens when you are along for the ride and assume that nothing will ever change. However, we have seen enough disruption—technological and otherwise—over the last few years to realize that change is inevitable. If you are always too busy to learn something new or to expand your network, you have got your priorities mixed up. However, if you make continuous growth and development a priority, you will be ready for whatever comes your way.

Having an inflatable ego

Did you ever work with someone who had a string of successes and started thinking that they were the be-all and end-all of superstardom? Success is great. It boosts your career, and it feels terrific. The problems begin once you let it go to your head. You start thinking that success is going to last forever and that you are entitled to it. Never, ever be content with resting on your laurels. Once you start thinking that you are the cat’s meow, you are setting yourself up for very painful failure.

Protection of the Status Quo

Fear of change is complacency’s evil twin. It actively works to keep things the same. I am sure you had seen this one first hand at work when someone uttered the dreaded words, “But we have always done it this way.” Things are changing too fast these days to latch on so tightly to the status quo, and the costs of doing so can be enormous. In one survey, 91% of respondents said that the most successful employees are the ones who can adapt to the changing workplace. Change is a constant part of our lives, both personally and professionally. It does not matter whether you think things should change or whether you prefer the old ways—change is. You do not have to learn to love it, but you do have to learn to stop resisting it and to start adapting to it.

The first thing we are taught at engineering school is “What’s the problem.” Once the problem is identified engineers are great at finding a solution. However, this approach tends to protect the status quo. Are we just fixing problems? Real vision and change come from also looking for the opportunity.

Nothing is less productive than to make more efficient what should not be done at all.” — Peter Drucker

If you are focused on only the problem, you will miss the disruptions that may make what you are doing redundant. Be open to looking at both sides of the coin.

What Should I Do?

The most successful among us are walking flaws who have maximized one or two strengths.” —Tim Ferriss

The first step is to increase your self-awareness. We all have a unique talent stack. You need to understand your behavioral strengths and challenges. Our unique combination of behavioral strengthens makes us better at certain things than our colleagues. You need to understand these strengths and not go overboard. Also, you need to be aware of your behaviors that are challenges and develop strategies to ensure these behaviors do not damage your reputation either.

At Allenvision, we start with your behavioral traits and your passions and match you with a career that allows you to thrive. Often after our assessment, clients learn that merely approaching their current role differently makes a big difference. We find that most people we assess just do not know how talented they are. Knowledge is power. You learn how to leverage your talents for career success and satisfaction. Also, you gain understand which behaviors are holding you back. You can focus on developing the elements of your talent stack further for your dream job. Our use powerful talent analytics to determine which of your 85 behavioral traits are strengths and which ones are challenges. Think of it our assessment as Behavioral DNA: The 23 and Me of Predicting Career Success

If you want to stop undermining your reputation and have career success and satisfaction, send us an email. We would love to hear from you! We offer the service worldwide.